Tuesday, July 25, 2006

they'll never hurt you like i do...

I can't imagine all the people that you know
and the places that you go
when the lights are turned down low
and I don't understand all the things you've seen
but I'm slipping in between
you and your big dreams
it's always you
in my big dreams

and you tell me that it's over
wake up lying in a patch of four leaf clovers
and you're restless, and I'm naked
you've gotta get out
you can't stand to see me shaking
no
could you let me go?
I didn't think so

and you don't wanna be here in the future
so you say the present's just a pleasant interruption to the past
and you don't wanna look much closer
cuz your afraid to find out all this hope you had sent into the sky by now had crashed
and it did
because of me

and then you bring me home
afraid to find out that you're alone
and I'm sleeping in your living room
but we don't have much room to live

I had these dreams in them I learned to play guitar
maybe cross the country
become a rock star
and there was hope in me that I could take you there
but dammit you're so young
well I don't think I care
and if I hurt you
then I'm sorry
please don't think that this was easy

then you'd bring me home
cuz we both know what it's like to be alone
and I'm dreaming in your living room
but we don't have much room to live

and konstantine is walking down the stairs
doesn't she look good
standing in her underwear
and I was thinking
what I was thinking
we've been drinking and it doesn't get me anywhere

my konstantine came walking down the stairs
and all that I could do is touch her long blonde hair
and I've been thinking
it hurts me thinking that these nights when we were drinking no they never got us anywhere
no

this is because I can spell konfusion with a k
and I can like it
it's to dying in another's arms and why I had to try it
it's to Jimmy Eat World and those nights in my car
when the first star you see may not be a star
I'm not your star
isn't that what you said
what you thought this song meant

and if this is what it takes
just to lie with my mistakes
and live with what I did to you
all the hell I put you through
I always catch the clock
it's 11:11
and now you want to talk
it's not hard to dream
you'll always be my konstantine

my konstantine, they'll never hurt you like I do
no they'll never hurt you like I do
no, no, no no no no no no

this is to a girl who got into my head
with all the pretty things she did
hey
you know
you keep me up in bed
this is to a girl who got into my head
with all these fucked up things I did
hey
maybe
baby
you could keep me up in bed
my Konstantine
you spin around me like a dream we played out on this movie screen
and I said
did you know I missed you? (x7)
I miss you

and then you bring me home
and we'll go to sleep, but this time, not alone, no no
and you'll kiss me in your living room
I know
you'll miss me in your living room
cuz these nights I think maybe that I'll miss you in my living room
we don't have much room
I said does anybody need that room?
because we all need alittle more room
to live

my Konstantine

Thursday, July 13, 2006

there and back again... a vintage tale

so the last 2 weeks have been a frenzy of emotions and many other things. being away from your girlfriend can be a real hastle but also a learning experience. i really think this time away from each other thou really hard, is really good for us both. we need to be able to operate idependantly but also together and it seems like we are totally starting to get a grasp on that. who knew how much reading the bible daily could change everything from the way u react to the guy that cuts you off first thing to just being happy about going into work. i mean i do work at a church but i mean even that can get stressfull at times. im really thankfull for the people around me and my current situation thou its not campbell and im the new fish in the bowl its nice to have new experiences (hard but nice). today i ate lunch with andrew at this old bowling alley. it was great. i think im ganna try and go bowling there sometime soon. or def. take ash when she gets back into town. there are so many little places like that to find here in this little area code they call raleigh. i need to spend my time enjoying the little things and stop freeking out about the big picture.

im reading this book called The Ragamuffin Gospel by Brennan Manning right now. tyler jones my paster read it when he first got into the ministry and it totally changed his outlook. im really excited about reading it. i havent gotten too far into it yet but... since im reading it for work i need to get on it. i'm also reading another book called Life of the Beloved by Henri Nouwen. i'll talk about that later. maybe thats why i never finish books i start reading one and then i jump to the next... eh.. i guess im an add reader. nothing really new. well its back to folding kids brochures for now at the good old office/closet @ v21.